As we bring another year to a close, we look back on a year that Her Majesty would call annus horribilis with regards to the financial worlds.  But while many look back with sorrow and sadness, others look to the future with hope and virtue.  The economist Alan Kohler sums it up well by saying in his newsletter "It’s been a huge year for us all: we’ve learnt plenty, lost some and, speaking personally, been fascinated by once-in-lifetime events. I hope you have managed to protect your capital and continue to do so, and that you have cash ready for what I expect will eventually be the greatest buying opportunity you will ever see."

During 2011 we have had the pleasure and privilege to work with hundreds of clients.  I hope that we have lived up to and exceeded their expectations, for our work has the power to shape their lives for the better.  We look forward to a long and prosperous relationship with you all as we enter 2012.

I for one will be with family and friends at Tenterfield this festive season.  Inevitably having eaten far too much turkey and imbibed in too much plonk, I'm likely to be on the lounge, watching the yachts sail through Sydney heads on Boxing Day; simultaneously watching Australia's new breed of cricketers trying to match India in the MCG classic.  Speaking of cricketers, my esteemed colleague Travis has just reminded me of a joke from last year; "What is the difference between Ricky Ponting and a phoenix?   A phoenix can rise after the ashes!".  Well obviously Ricky can too.  But can he rise after a firey curry?

In this issue Amy Wren gives a few tips on having a low stress Christmas and we've done a Q&A with Santa (when he was in doing his tax return).

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a 2012 that meets all your goals.

Cheers

Pete Crothers
Partner



A Final Joke for 2011:
A young man named Al received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's' mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. Al tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, Al was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. Al shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. Al, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, Al quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Al's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

Al was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, very softly...
"May I ask what the turkey did?"

Putting the Merry into Merry Christmas

Article by Amy Wren
akw@insightcpa.com
 

Christmas, as described in Terry Pratchett’s novel The Hogfather:

“It’s supposed to be jolly, with mistletoe and holly, and other things ending in olly.  It’s a time when people are meant to feel good about things and eat 'til they explode.  A time when they want to see all their relatives.  It’s a time when humans are really human.”

Christmas is this and so much more.  It’s a time when families come far and wide, to share the day with loved ones, to share the smiles, the laughs, to relax and enjoy the atmosphere that is the Christmas spirit.

Unfortunately, even the mention of the word can cause a spine-tingling sensation up one’s spine and leave with a twitch in the eye, for Christmas means only 1 thing; STRESS!!!

Ever noticed that you have never heard a child say “I don’t like Christmas – it’s too stressful”?

This Christmas, take it easy, relax & enjoy Christmas like a child.

Take some time out to decorate the Christmas Tree, and if feeling very much in spirit, the rest of the house as well.  Nothing gets the spirit of Christmas flowing than to see tinsel hanging from the tree, to see Santa figurines smiling at you from the table and to look around your house and see lots of colour & cheer.

Having family over for lunch or dinner?  Don’t stress!  Share the workload & ask for a contribution plate to go towards the meal.  Worried about the cleaning up afterwards?  Don’t stress!  Use plastic plates, bowls & cutlery – very garbage bin friendly.

Worried about your diet? Don’t be silly! There’s no need to eat till you explode.  Enjoy the Christmas food in healthy portions.  Drink plenty of water inbetween the enjoying of alcoholic beverages.  Don’t be afraid to add some extra vegies & fruit to the menu.  If in doubt, relax & enjoy the day in Christmas spirit.  Remember a diet is making you feel better about yourself and creating a “new you”.  If you laugh loud & go to bed with saw facial muscles from laughing so much, you’ve already done yourself a favour, for laughter is a great stress reliever & a good start towards creating a more positive outlook in life.

Feeling like the bank account isn’t enjoying the Christmas season as much as you had hoped?  Christmas shopping making your hair turn grey?  Learn from your mistakes from this year and prepare better next year.  Try budgeting your Christmas expenditure by putting away a little money each week starting January 2012.  $20 each week starting the first week of 2012, can amount to $960 when December comes round again.  Tried online shopping?  There are no crowds and is a lot less stressful if doing last-minute shopping.

Remember to get overexcited & laugh wholeheartedly at anything you see.  Get in amongst the children, and join the fun of popping Christmas crackers and the unwrapping of presents in a way that’s not at all graceful.  At Christmas time, the occasion isn’t just limited to the kids.  The big kids can enjoy the fun too.

I was recently reading a newsletter from another accounting firm, and I’d like to share with you a tip they had to help you relax when stressed.  If you are stressed, start whistling.  Ever noticed you can’t whistle if you aren’t relaxed?
 
And for those that will be travelling the roads during this joyous period, drive safely, get plenty of sleep & stay relaxed.  Give yourselves plenty of time to reach your destination to minimise the pressure of rushing & getting there quicker.

Questions & Answers with Santa

Article by Santa Claus
santa@insightcpa.com

Every year in December I am asked a great many questions.  Although I can travel around the world in one night, I can't always answer every question from every one, so with a little help from my friends at Insight, I'm going to answer some of the more frequently asked questions now.

Many children are worried that if their house doesn't have a chimney then I won't be able to bring them presents.  My friends at Fermilab have helped with  this, with a little bit of work I can make a chimney appear on any roof that doesn't have one and then let it disappear again when I'm done.  And don't worry if you think that your chimney is too small for me to fit, I can be very flexible, just ask Mrs Claus ho ho ho.  And if there's a fire burning, let's just say I wear these thick boots and wool suit for a very good reason.

When I'm visiting local shopping centers and children tell me that they are going somewhere other than their home for Christmas, or they are going to move house all together, I assure them that I will always be able to find them on Christmas eve.

One question I'm always asked in the southern hemisphere is about snow.  I don't need snow to get around, in fact I spend 364 days a year in the snow so it's good to get out into the warm Queensland night air.

Ho Ho Ho, this next one is my favourite.  What is my favourite food on Christmas eve?  As Mrs Claus will attest, I eat anything (and between you and me with her cooking you have to eat anything).  I do enjoy cake and milk, but a good pork pie and a dry sherry wouldn't go astray from time to time.  Just don't put out any venison, it freaks out Blitzen and Donna says it's barbaric.  The reindeer are easily pleased with a carrot, one will feed them all.

My next favourite is when I am asked, how do you get around the whole world in just one night?  Well there's no easy answer to this one, but the time zones help.  Over the years many people have suggested that it is impossible for me to fly around the world and visit all those children in one night, and they are right.  Instead, the world fly's around me and I just stay where I am.  

Similarly I am often asked how I fit an entire world's worth of toys into one sleigh.  This one I try not to think about, it hurts my head to think about objects with more than four degrees of freedom.

I hope this helps to answer some of your questions, I'm not going to answer too many questions after all I enjoy having some air of mystery about my person.  Merry Christmas to you all, and don't wait up for me, I know when you're sleeping.